(I know you got the allusion…)
So, I lost it again on twitter today.
On one side, my friend was telling me about his worries concerning me going to a seminar held by Mickaël Roads.
The thing is, I know he’s worried, but telling me how I’m being naive and lied to and wasting money because I believe this seminar can help me feel good can get annoying.
Especially when I feel he’s trying to convince me to « give up my believes » – I have dangerous believes: I believe there is more to the world than we can see. Yea, I might preach to people – I’ve never done it, but maybe – and I might die or kill for it – erm, no, never. (I am making it sound worse and sillier, you know that, it’s a blog article)
On the other side, someone was talking about cisgendered and transgendered people and having their periods. I had the stupidity to ask « can we then use « biological sex » instead of genders? » – I was talking about periods, I have that stupid notion that it’s females – biological sex – that have them, regardless of their genders.
You see, I consider myself a « genderqueer female ». I have no effing idea what genders are, I don’t recognise myself in the usual « woman » representation, but I do know that I can feel « feminine » or « masculine », it fluctuates.
(I tend to switch to « boy mode » around girls I like, spread legs included, but that’s definitely not the only time)
I understand there are biological sexes and genders, that people can be non-binary – I am – but I never studied everything about it.
I am willing to learn, though, but twitter isn’t the right place – try explaining this in 140 characters.
I got told to « go get fucked with [my] biological sex ».
I lost it.
I told twitter I was done with it and told it to « do a fucking survival manual for people willing to learn about cis/trans and sex/gender. I WANT TO UNDERSTAND! »
A nice person on twitter explained to me, kuddos to them for doing it and on such a format. If you read this, know you rock.
So, now I’m stuck: facebook drives me nuts with its new format – and we don’t chat on there anyway ; I don’t want to go back on twitter – I feel dumb, stupid, and like I took a door in my face ; that leaves me with dear old emails and skype to stay in touch with people.
I spend time on instagram too, looking at « boho » pictures …
I’ll still check mentions and DMs and I will go over to Facebook every so often. But I think it’ll do me good to stay away from all this for a while. (There goes my social life…)
Friends, you have my email – or you can ask for it.